April 2019 - The Promises
April 3: On my 30th year of sobriety (yes, I've decided to break my anonymity for a friend in need), I find myself reviewing the benchmarks of the past 3, 9, 15 and 30 years and see all the changes and challenges I've lived through. Some of them were funny, heart-warming and others were painful - even life threatening, and I survived it all one day at a time; sometimes one minute at a time. The latest benchmark happened this past weekend. It was a "moment douce". I had 2 acoustic shows at The Royal Theatre in Gananoque. Two intimate shows where I was able to witness the audiences' reactions to my stories, songs' lyrics and music; an intimate weekend of gigs with 2 wonderful guitarists who abandoned themselves to their art; a weekend with the theatre owners who welcomed us with open arms and spoke of the magic that happens on stage when players fall in love for and during that moment in time which in turn leads the audiences to fall in love with the perfomers and surrender themselves to the moment; and the look on my hubby's face as if he is hearing the same songs he's heard a thousand times, for the very first time. This weekend was a benchmark for me because it was a pocket of time when people, places and things were aligned in full serenity and flow. It took a lot of focus, hard work and most importantly - surrendering to my higher power. I've survived 15 768 000 minutes, or, 262 800 hours, or, 10 950 days, or, 30 years; I don't know what the next minute will bring. It could be the end or a continuation or another change. But if it does end, I can say that I have been blessed with a wondrous opportunity to share who I am with a chosen few and can then take my last breathe with a smile because this is what I was meant to be doing all along. I made it long enough to see that The Promises do happen and it has happened to me at least twice in my life.